Hide Comments Below
  • -3
  • -2
  • -1
  • 0
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • off
  • Welcome to ze Beer Garden - please try to stay SFW for now



    Comment 0
    Cool
  • vote cool
  • vote uncool
  • Terms of Service Violation
  • strike inappropriate
  • not inappropriate
  • Other
  • sunlight
  • kick from thread
  • get permlink
  • Comments 101 through 182 of 182 shown. Page 1 2
    grahams 5 2014-10-30 14:03:26.0 login to vote score 1
    marla singer's laundry: EXTREEEEEEEEME!!!


    Wear your helmet. Seriously, be careful out there.


    She's x-treme with an X.
    cardinal puff 887 2014-10-30 14:15:23.0 login to vote score 2
    trigonman3:

    Fuck standard time. Who needs standards?!
    valentinselezynov 3304 2014-10-30 14:20:54.0 login to vote score 3
    sabine: I really hope you are enjoying it. Have not given Last Light another go-through yet, but it's still available on the shelf. What I'm most curious about is your opinion of my moderate disappointment about insufficient opportunities for participating in the preparation and actual heist itself in 3 Leaf Clover given that I was going into it expecting something along the lines of that Caligula's Palace strand.

    I am. It is very dated. In some ways games from the 8/16-bit eras stand up a little better than the early 3D games like this, and it's hard to believe that this is the same game i would play and just drive around while using the Xbox's ability to play custom soundtracks in-game, as i getting ready for my driving test in the real world. Rockstar's writing has always been the main draw for me though, and the missions are enjoyable.

    I think that a big theme in GTA IV, is that Niko just finds himself in a series of increasingly fucked up situations, where he is kind of only minimally at fault.

    Circumstance forced him to flee Bulgarin, and his cousin's lies and debt forced him into Liberty City's underworld. The escape part of Three Leaf Clover is one of the most intense parts of the whole game, and i think that if Niko took part in the preparation, that would have undermined the plot a little bit. Niko being recruited into it at the very last moment felt very appropriate.

    From a gameplay perspective though, there is no argument that being involved in the planning of a big job like that is a lot of fun, and was one of the most enjoyable parts of GTA V. It works in all sorts of games actually; one of the things i really liked about The Witcher 2, was that you would have to do a lot of ground work before confronting the game's bigger monsters - things like working out where they are, their strengths and weaknesses, creating traps... that sort of thing.

    Sometimes when playing a game you can feel like a bit of a passenger. Being a part of the scheming and plotting definitely makes you feel important. But i do think that from a narrative perspective, that feeling of being a passenger worked in Niko's case.
    sabine 745 2014-10-30 14:28:02.0 login to vote score 2
    valentinselezynov: Rockstar's writing has always been the main draw for me though

    Totally concur. There's something about the sort of self-aware mocking touch that they put on characters like Wu Zi Mu, Zero, Ryder, Catalina, Kent Paul, OG Loc, and Mike Toreno that was lacking in the more hard-boiled characters in IV and V. In that respect, the Saints Row franchise did an admirable job of picking up that torch, I suppose.
    mimir 6886 2014-10-30 14:59:46.0 login to vote score 9
    Posting from the airport on the way home.

    Because fuck you.
    thatsnotmine 2471 2014-10-30 15:24:33.0 login to vote score 9
    mimir: Posting from the airport on the way home.

    Because fuck you.


    Rough cavity search this time?
    farkmeblind 482 2014-10-30 15:26:45.0 login to vote score 4
    mimir 6886 2014-10-30 15:27:25.0 login to vote score 2
    thatsnotmine: Rough cavity search this time?

    Yeah, but she was hot so i didnt mind.
    kesshi 1556 2014-10-30 15:34:53.0 login to vote score 0
    thatsnotmine: Rough cavity search this time?

    He's probably upset that he did not get the cavity search this time trough.
    farkmeblind 482 2014-10-30 15:43:24.0 login to vote score 4
    bucket of truth 1525 2014-10-30 16:27:27.0 login to vote score 3
    I love the look on her face and I can't find a post to reply to where this is appropriate.


    libs keep banning me 9992 2014-10-30 16:37:55.0 login to vote score 1
    Another night, another ceremonial turbo-douche sellout AC/DC link zapped from the queue in memory of tbs.
    random bacon 12498 2014-10-30 16:49:01.0 login to vote score 0
    bucket of truth: I love the look on her face and I can't find a post to reply to where this is appropriate.

    [image removed]


    You got an honest to god snort out of me on that one.
    hobo as a nerd 12027 2014-10-30 16:59:43.0 login to vote score 1
    spongegirl circleskirt: Oh hey. Here's my new bike!

    But but but.......... That is a girls bike!
    hobo as a nerd 12027 2014-10-30 17:01:40.0 login to vote score 1
    marla singer's laundry: EXTREEEEEEEEME!!!


    Wear your helmet. Seriously, be careful out there.


    There is apparently considerable evidence that bike helmets do more harm than good. Decent acceptance of bike riders is a definite benefit though.
    strayling 20 2014-10-30 17:08:42.0 login to vote score 4
    Important safety tips:


    Customer Reviews: Veet for Men Hair Removal Gel Creme 200 ml

    Customer wrote:
    After having been told my danglies (American: "dingle-berries") looked like an elderly rastafarian I decided to take the plunge and buy some of this as previous shaving attempts had only been mildly succesful and I nearly put my back out trying to reach the more difficult bits.

    Being a bit of a romantic I thought I would do the deed on the missus's birthday as a bit of a treat.I ordered it well in advance and working in the North sea I considerd myself a bit above some of the characters writing the previous reviews and wrote them off as soft office types...oh my fellow sufferers how wrong I was.

    I waited until the other half was tucked up in bed and after giving some vague hints about a special surprise I went down to the bathroom. Initially all went well and I applied the gel and stood waiting for something to happen. I didn't have long to wait.

    At first there was a gentle warmth which in a matter of seconds was replaced by an intense burning and a feeling I can only describe as like being given a barbed wire wedgie by two people intent on hitting the ceiling with my head.

    Religion hadn't featured much in my life until that night but I suddenly became willing to convert to any religion to stop the violent burning around the turd tunnel and what seemed like the destruction of the meat and two veg.

    Stuggling to not bite through my bottom lip I tried to wash the gel of in the sink and only succeeded in blocking the plughole with a mat of hair.Through the haze of tears I struggled out of the bathroom across the hall into the kitchen by this time walking was not really possible and I crawled the final yard to the fridge in the hope of some form of cold relief.

    I yanked the freezer drawer out and found a tub of ice cream, tore the lid of and positioned it under me. The relief was fantastic but only temporary as it melted fairly quickly and the fiery stabbing soon returned.

    Due to the shape of the ice cream tub I hadn't managed to give the starfish any treatment and I groped around in the draw for something else as I was sure my vision was going to fail fairly soon. I grabbed a bag of what I later found out was frozen sprouts and tore it open trying to be quiet as I did so. I took a handful of them and tried in vain to clench some between the cheeks of my arse.

    This was not doing the trick as some of the gel had found it's way up the chutney channel and it felt like the space shuttle was running it's engines behind me.This was probably and hopefully the only time in my life I was going to wish there was a gay snowman in the kitchen which should give you some idea of the depths I was willing to sink to in order to ease the pain.

    The only solution my pain crazed mind could come up with was to gently ease one of the sprouts where no veg had gone before.

    Unfortunately, alerted by the strange grunts coming from the kitchen the other half chose that moment to come and investigate and was greeted by the sight of me, arse in the air, strawberry ice cream dripping from my bell end pushing a sprout up my arse while muttering..." Ooooh that feels good "

    Understandingly this was a shock to her and she let out a scream and as I hadn't heard her come in it caused an involutary spasm of shock in myself which resulted in the sprout being ejected at quite some speed in her direction.

    I can understand that having a sprout farted against your leg at 11 at night in the kitchen probably wasn't the special surprise she was expecting and having to explain to the kids the next day what the strange hollow in the ice cream was didn't improve my status...So to sum it up Veet removes hair, dignity and self respect....... :-
    ambition chicken 290 2014-10-30 17:09:33.0 login to vote score 1
    hAxx0R aL3rT!!!1!!



    And it's not the first time!
    karkfumm 1294 2014-10-30 17:12:09.0 login to vote score 4
    quinblake 1476 2014-10-30 17:24:03.0 login to vote score 2
    hobo as a nerd: There is apparently considerable evidence that bike helmets do more harm than good. Decent acceptance of bike riders is a definite benefit though.

    I've never worn a bike helmet except when required to do so for a few marathons I was involved in. Nasty things, I hates them.

    That is one of two things that makes z actually a little angry with me: no bike helmet and I won't put collars on my cats.
    random bacon 12498 2014-10-30 17:27:08.0 login to vote score 1
    quinblake: I've never worn a bike helmet except when required to do so for a few marathons I was involved in. Nasty things, I hates them.
    That is one of two things that makes z actually a little angry with me: no bike helmet and I won't put collars on my cats.


    I'll only wear one when I ride to work, I'm on a major road the entire time. People down here are utter maniacs on the road.
    farkmeblind 482 2014-10-30 17:31:03.0 login to vote score 2
    strayling: Important safety tips:
    :-


    OMG I haven't laughed that hard in a week.

    *wipes tears*
    farkmeblind 482 2014-10-30 17:33:50.0 login to vote score 2
    For years i had wondered what little Jim (because you go there for a work out) would look like with a new and stylish hair cut. Stephan, my hair dresser, has always recommended that I get my eye brows waxed as he claims it would open up my eyes and remove 10 to 15 pounds of hair from my brow, easing strain on my neck and preventing scratching my corneas prematurely.

    So i thought, why stop at the eye brows. Surely Jim deserves a new lease on life as well. I mean, he gets very hot in there and begins to smell like a giants sock that got left in the corner of the bathroom for two weeks following playing in a mud puddle.

    As any male would do, I paid off reading the label. If i didn't read them when replacing the brakes on my grandmas 1992 Pintara, I certainly wouldn't for this. Setting myself up for success, I attempted this after enjoying six scotches (to numb the pain) and lowered myself into a dry bath with the plan of banging on the water when the time was up to scrub away what resembled tom seleck wearing an oversized spider on his head. I imagined the warm water rushing over the smooth as eggs marbles and a deceptively bigger looking Jim. Jim would frolic in the water while I lavished attention on him, and we would be the happier for it.

    Needless to say, 30 mins later i woke up to a piercing scream that sounded somewhere between Alanis Morrisette singing opera and a baboon that just ate its own turd for the first time. It took me a few minutes to realise that this sound was emitting from my own throat. Jim now resembled a midget in a bright red swim suit cowering in fear in the corner of a room, sitting on an equally bright red bean bag.

    It has now been 2 weeks. The medicated hand lotion that I rub into the team hourly has eased most of the pain. Pants are now able to be worn when moving around without Jim causing my brain to implode, and he is now able to be handled without the use of a soft felt cloth, cotton balls and a lot of TLC.

    All in all, I would recommend the experience to all. It now looks like two slightly sunburnt looking "`Mini-me's" hanging below a more resourceful, more dynamic, more capable and certainly a well groomed Jim. Of a side note, both my parents and the treating doctors at the emergency ward commented on how smooth and well groomed the package looks. It's a shame the rest of my body still looks like the wolf man having sex with a Yeti.

    /any time the reviews have a higher Google rating than the actual product...it's probably worth reading.
    trigonman3 63 2014-10-30 18:21:11.0 login to vote score 0
    bunnythor: And here's one for the next time one of our village idiots has a thread meltdown.

    I've heard redheads are crazy.
    totalsecurity 1281 2014-10-30 18:36:12.0 login to vote score 2
    trigonman3: I've heard redheads are crazy.

    The risk is well worth the reward.

    There are worse ways to die.
    farkmeblind 482 2014-10-30 18:38:38.0 login to vote score 3
    totalsecurity: The risk is well worth the reward.

    There are worse ways to die.



    totalsecurity 1281 2014-10-30 18:40:20.0 login to vote score 0
    farkmeblind:

    My member is turgid.
    farkmeblind 482 2014-10-30 19:02:10.0 login to vote score 0
    totalsecurity: My member is turgid.

    Tease.
    farkmeblind 482 2014-10-30 19:39:21.0 login to vote score 2
    Pizza hates me. So what am I having for dinner? MOAR PIZZA! Fuck you, intestines!
    spongegirl circleskirt 382 2014-10-30 19:58:44.0 login to vote score 0
    kesshi: So you are no longer bike-curious?

    Heh.


    Also. I hate the helmet too, but there is a helmet law for cyclists in my town.
    iggins 5808 2014-10-30 21:43:48.0 login to vote score 0
    cannonhawk 849 2014-10-30 21:53:24.0 login to vote score 1
    League of Legends titty-cam.
    iggins 5808 2014-10-30 21:53:42.0 login to vote score 1
    kesshi: Iggins reported to have 3 of these on order, too. Hopefully for different reasons.

    and




    iggins 5808 2014-10-30 22:10:23.0 login to vote score 0
    cannonhawk: League of Legends titty-cam.

    link?
    iggins 5808 2014-10-30 22:10:45.0 login to vote score 5
    so this is why Grahams married an American


    iggins 5808 2014-10-30 22:12:31.0 login to vote score 0
    iggins 5808 2014-10-30 22:18:27.0 login to vote score 1
    iggins 5808 2014-10-30 22:20:38.0 login to vote score 1
    iggins 5808 2014-10-30 22:23:53.0 login to vote score 2
    iggins 5808 2014-10-30 22:24:24.0 login to vote score 1
    To love is to Sojin


    iggins 5808 2014-10-30 22:47:13.0 login to vote score 3
    bunnythor 544 2014-10-30 22:53:44.0 login to vote score 4
    iggins 5808 2014-10-30 22:55:32.0 login to vote score 4
    iggins 5808 2014-10-30 23:03:43.0 login to vote score 3
    iggins 5808 2014-10-30 23:05:40.0 login to vote score 2
    when ever i get asked where do i see myself in five years at a job interview


    eddyatwork 998 2014-10-30 23:11:36.0 login to vote score 0
    spongegirl circleskirt: That was an extremely hairy lady bit.

    Reminds me of a sadistic drug addled walking carpet.


    If you'd stop engaging sasquatch, maybe she'd go away.
    eddyatwork 998 2014-10-30 23:13:48.0 login to vote score 2
    mimir: Posting from the airport on the way home.

    Because fuck you.


    MIMIR! If you don't stop posting twitter shitter updates here, I'm going to RIP OFF YOUR BALLS and then just throw them on the ground and walk away because it's not YOU USE THEM!
    eddyatwork 998 2014-10-30 23:15:12.0 login to vote score 2
    hobo as a nerd: But but but.......... That is a girls bike!

    I hate to break it to you, but spongegirl is indeed...a female.
    iggins 5808 2014-10-30 23:17:41.0 login to vote score 5
    the shit i put up with at work



    iggins 5808 2014-10-30 23:18:07.0 login to vote score 1
    eddyatwork: MIMIR! If you don't stop posting twitter shitter updates here, I'm going to RIP OFF YOUR BALLS and then just throw them on the ground and walk away because it's not YOU USE THEM!

    i twitter on the shitter.


    but mostly i play candy crush
    eddyatwork 998 2014-10-30 23:19:11.0 login to vote score 1
    iggins: and

    I don't understand what is happening in this picture.
    eddyatwork 998 2014-10-30 23:19:39.0 login to vote score 1
    iggins: so this is why Grahams married an American

    You're gonna get shadowbanned!
    eddyatwork 998 2014-10-30 23:31:58.0 login to vote score 2
    I went out to a lame work party and ate over half a pizza. About two hours later I was home and took a poop. Everything was fine.

    I just had a disturbing gurgling which generally means things are about to go south as in...rage poop time.
    burntman 1528 2014-10-31 00:25:50.0 login to vote score 4
    churly brown 12899 2014-10-31 00:40:24.0 login to vote score 2
    Haha, Iggins.
    I'm meeting your hothothakkamama in 21 minutes!
    iggins 5808 2014-10-31 01:07:01.0 login to vote score 1
    churly brown: Haha, Iggins.
    I'm meeting your hothothakkamama in 21 minutes!


    stick it where she poops
    iggins 5808 2014-10-31 01:22:39.0 login to vote score 1
    here is more CL


    iggins 5808 2014-10-31 01:30:22.0 login to vote score 4
    iggins 5808 2014-10-31 01:42:43.0 login to vote score 0
    iggins 5808 2014-10-31 01:44:49.0 login to vote score 1
    iggins 5808 2014-10-31 01:53:35.0 login to vote score 0
    spam siting in the QUEUEUE



    SPLIT YOUR LUNGS WITH BLOOD AND THUNDER, WHEN YOU SEE THE WHITE WHALE!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    spongegirl circleskirt 382 2014-10-31 02:30:10.0 login to vote score 0
    farkmeblind: snu snu

    I used to like being spongy and bruised.
    spongegirl circleskirt 382 2014-10-31 02:32:24.0 login to vote score 4
    spongegirl circleskirt: I used to like being spongy and bruised.

    Thanks Fibrobama!
    iggins 5808 2014-10-31 02:34:22.0 login to vote score 1
    dammit, why does no one every tag my horsecock loves phil tag
    churly brown 12899 2014-10-31 02:35:45.0 login to vote score 2
    iggins: stick it where she poops

    Iggurt,

    here's what happened. We were chatting about kawaii. I couldn't remember if I'd seem 可愛い in kanji or not. But ke3 ai2 made sense as a phrase. We talked about my shitty Ed Hardy knock-off 帽子-T. (C'mon... it says "Beowulf, dragon flutter, ground power, adventure energy!!! In gebrochene Schrift...) Then, she showed me the hoodie she wants. And spent 15 minutes showing pics and complaining about not having the $60.

    The message is clear: I could tap it for $60.

    That is so heart-breaking that I could never do it. Hell, I'm paying her friend twice that to accompany me to dinner and tell me what people said later. I might hire this girl.

    That's me... Cap'n Sav-A-Ho. I wish I could set you up. She's not a drunk, not as ... antiseptic ... as most of your ladies, but... nice.
    iggins 5808 2014-10-31 03:20:48.0 login to vote score 1
    churly brown: Iggurt,

    here's what happened. We were chatting about kawaii. I couldn't remember if I'd seem 可愛い in kanji or not. But ke3 ai2 made sense as a phrase. We talked about my shitty Ed Hardy knock-off 帽子-T. (C'mon... it says "Beowulf, dragon flutter, ground power, adventure energy!!! In gebrochene Schrift...) Then, she showed me the hoodie she wants. And spent 15 minutes showing pics and complaining about not having the $60.

    The message is clear: I could tap it for $60.

    That is so heart-breaking that I could never do it. Hell, I'm paying her friend twice that to accompany me to dinner and tell me what people said later. I might hire this girl.

    That's me... Cap'n Sav-A-Ho. I wish I could set you up. She's not a drunk, not as ... antiseptic ... as most of your ladies, but... nice.


    so for 60 bucks, i can find love?
    churly brown 12899 2014-10-31 03:29:11.0 login to vote score 1
    iggins: so for 60 bucks, i can find love?

    What is love, but a weakness? An exploit? An unpatched security breech? She's an okay kid. I think she has money problems, which may be worse than a drinking problem.

    Laws act like you pay a whore so she'll fuck you. You pay a whore so she goes away.

    She could do much worse than you. The ugliness of the world is that I may get to watch her do exactly that!
    iggins 5808 2014-10-31 03:34:32.0 login to vote score 1
    churly brown: What is love, but a weakness? An exploit? An unpatched security breech? She's an okay kid. I think she has money problems, which may be worse than a drinking problem.

    Laws act like you pay a whore so she'll fuck you. You pay a whore so she goes away.

    She could do much worse than you. The ugliness of the world is that I may get to watch her do exactly that!


    what is love?


    baby don't hurt me

    don't hurt me



    no more
    grotfabrieken rubbishhausen 561 2014-10-31 04:37:38.0 login to vote score 0
    hobo as a nerd: There is apparently considerable evidence that bike helmets do more harm than good. Decent acceptance of bike riders is a definite benefit though.

    There is a lot of cherry picked info out there about this and helmet discussions usually devolve into flame wars.
    Here's a decent summary. If you go off to the Googles, you end up with pony sites galore arguing about government intrusion, shoddy science, etc.

    Personally, I won't ride without a helmet. I had a pretty serious crash years ago where my head smacked the pavement. There's a pony site that says my helmet didn't protect me at all, but I beg to differ.
    burntman 1528 2014-10-31 04:40:27.0 login to vote score 0
    iggins: spam siting in the QUEUEUE



    SPLIT YOUR LUNGS WITH BLOOD AND THUNDER, WHEN YOU SEE THE WHITE WHALE!!!!!!!!!!!!!


    metal sucks.
    iggins 5808 2014-10-31 05:15:12.0 login to vote score 0
    burntman: metal sucks.

    you suck
    iggins 5808 2014-10-31 05:18:59.0 login to vote score 3
    iggins 5808 2014-10-31 05:28:46.0 login to vote score 0
    aww jesus i got blood everywhere
    nerd by proxy 4296 2014-10-31 05:31:04.0 login to vote score 2
    Good morning, guys!

    Smile time: Do you know the Iggy Azalea song "Black Widow"? I was hanging out with my four year old niece, and she started singing that song. She sang, "I'm gonna love ya, like a black little baby..."

    So cute!
    nerd by proxy 4296 2014-10-31 05:31:26.0 login to vote score 1
    iggins: aww jesus i got blood everywhere

    Umm, wat?
    churly brown 12899 2014-10-31 05:32:27.0 login to vote score 2
    burntman: metal sucks.

    Meh... I'd suck metal if it was metal enough.


    Rob Halford, call me.
    burntman 1528 2014-10-31 05:47:59.0 login to vote score 1
    iggins: you suck

    Nope.
    iggins 5808 2014-10-31 06:03:31.0 login to vote score 0
    iggins 5808 2014-10-31 06:05:32.0 login to vote score 0
    nerd by proxy: Umm, wat?

    i cut myself, and it bled
    iggins 5808 2014-10-31 06:06:15.0 login to vote score 0
    iggins 5808 Fri Oct 31 06:08:47 PDT 2014 login to vote score 0
    I bet Sojin likes huskies


    iggins 5808 Fri Oct 31 06:12:17 PDT 2014 login to vote score 0
    burntman: Nope.

    yes
    roddikinsathome 1812 Fri Oct 31 06:17:11 PDT 2014 login to vote score 0
    iggins: dammit, why does no one every tag my horsecock loves phil tag

    BECAUSE IT'S TWO IN THE BLEEDING A.M.!! Chillax.
    Comments 101 through 182 of 182 shown. Page 1 2
    If you logged in, you could post here.