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  • How do I convince my straight wife to do another woman?



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  • Tagged with : $3.50 , a big ass knife , ass to ass , bumping muffins , cool story private parts , erectile insertion , get a goat , install larger penis , install tequila , premature nationalisation , rohypnol , roofies , take away her food , tequila

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    the anonymous instigator 1335 2010-05-21 08:24:00.0 login to vote score 0
    I would like to watch her do another woman and possibly let me in on it. She has never been with a woman and hasn't really expressed any interest but I think that once she plays with some boobs, she will like it.

    Any suggestions?

    SFW - because I am at work
    swingingjohnson 175 2010-05-21 08:24:51.0 login to vote score 2
    Get her drunk.
    swingingjohnson 175 2010-05-21 08:25:32.0 login to vote score 0
    Get her drunk, and take her to an all nude strip club.


    osirisothedead 1858 2010-05-21 08:25:51.0 login to vote score 24
    Would you suck a dick if your wife asked? No? Then quit bothering her.
    yosofine 1300 2010-05-21 08:26:07.0 login to vote score 1
    She may like the other woman better than you after that. Are you sure that's what you want? Some things are better off staying as fantasies.
    quick1 501 2010-05-21 08:26:20.0 login to vote score 2
    Tell her that God wants you to have a threesome.
    swingingjohnson 175 2010-05-21 08:27:16.0 login to vote score 1
    Does subby have the alt woman in mind already?

    You can always get her drunk and set the scenario up with an escort with a well planned script.


    But really... mutilato is the bN expert on this kinda stuff.
    worldbeater 617 2010-05-21 08:27:43.0 login to vote score 0
    Ask Jesus to help you out.
    xomber 4626 2010-05-21 08:27:53.0 login to vote score 6
    Put it in her pooper.

    And when she comes back at you with a MMW in exchange for your WMW you better be game.
    osirisothedead 1858 2010-05-21 08:27:58.0 login to vote score 5
    swingingjohnson: But really... mutilato is the bN expert on this kinda stuff.

    mutilato is in to consensual sex, not coercion.
    abe froman 2713 2010-05-21 08:28:42.0 login to vote score 1
    osirisothedead: mutilato is in to consensual sex, not coercion.

    Six of one, half dozen of the other. Whatever gets the job done.
    swingingjohnson 175 2010-05-21 08:28:46.0 login to vote score 1
    quick1: Tell her that God wants you to have a threesome.

    That reminds me!

    Since I've been single for the past 48 hours, I should go to church this Sunday.

    I hear Church can be a pussy smorgasbord.
    swingingjohnson 175 2010-05-21 08:29:34.0 login to vote score 0
    osirisothedead: mutilato is in to consensual sex, not coercion.

    Really.

    He's my hero.

    I really want to be like him when I grow up.
    worldbeater 617 2010-05-21 08:29:46.0 login to vote score 0
    osirisothedead: Would you suck a dick if your wife asked?

    Sneaky, man. Very sneaky.
    abe froman 2713 2010-05-21 08:29:47.0 login to vote score 1
    swingingjohnson: That reminds me!

    Since I've been single for the past 48 hours, I should go to church this Sunday.

    I hear Church can be a pussy smorgasbord.


    I love pussy too, but not that much.
    pyroy 93 2010-05-21 08:31:22.0 login to vote score 0
    MDMA
    someone who may or may not be subby 2010-05-21 08:31:53.0 login to vote score 1
    osirisothedead: Would you suck a dick if your wife asked? No? Then quit bothering her.

    Yes. In the pooper too.
    abbynormal 1917 2010-05-21 08:33:54.0 login to vote score 0
    If she's straight you are pretty much out of luck. Has she ever done anything that makes you think she has some leanings?


    nerd by proxy 4296 2010-05-21 08:34:11.0 login to vote score 0
    Install tequila.
    jimmythehutt 2751 2010-05-21 08:35:13.0 login to vote score 1
    osirisothedead: Would you suck a dick if your wife asked? No? Then quit bothering her.

    And we have a winner for the thread!
    quick1 501 2010-05-21 08:35:24.0 login to vote score 4
    swingingjohnson: That reminds me!

    Since I've been single for the past 48 hours, I should go to church this Sunday.

    I hear Church can be a pussy smorgasbord.


    And how has trying to fuck crazy women sane worked for you so far?
    jimmythehutt 2751 2010-05-21 08:35:44.0 login to vote score 0
    osirisothedead: mutilato is in to consensual sex, not coercion.

    Which is a huge distinction.
    valentinselezynov 3304 2010-05-21 08:36:00.0 login to vote score 6
    If you want your wife to start doing women you could try subliminal messages. Every night in bed, when she's asleep, whisper "you want to have sex with Chloe from work and you want to let me watch".
    jimmythehutt 2751 2010-05-21 08:36:15.0 login to vote score 1
    quick1: And how has trying to fuck crazy women sane worked for you so far?

    Considering his mental state to begin with, I don't think he's qualified to fuck a pillow sane.
    abe froman 2713 2010-05-21 08:37:01.0 login to vote score 0
    jimmythehutt: Considering his mental state to begin with, I don't think he's qualified to fuck a pillow sane.

    But would he fuck a sane girl crazy?
    nerd by proxy 4296 2010-05-21 08:37:04.0 login to vote score 3
    valentinselezynov: If you want your wife to start doing women you could try subliminal messages. Every night in bed, when she's asleep, whisper "you want to have sex with Chloe from work and you want to let me watch".

    Subby should dress up like a lesbian while he's scheming--I hear that helps with some things. :)
    swingingjohnson 175 2010-05-21 08:37:28.0 login to vote score 3
    the anonymous instigator:


    Get some VISINE. A minute before she walks in the door drop 1/2 the bottle in your eyes.

    This will simulate that you were crying.

    Then when she walks in, start to wipe the tears from your eyes. Act like you don't want her to see you cry.

    Well it's obvious your crying... so when she consoles you and ask you "Ohhh, what's the matter sweetheart? You can tell me... what is it honey?"

    That's when you tell her you fainted at work today and you woke up in the ER. The doctors told you you have inoperable brain cancer. You have a month to live at the most.

    THEN, she starts crying you tell her how unfair life is. "I'm too young to die... there's so much I wanted to do.... sniff, sniff."

    THEN, she cries with you and tries to cheer you up... she makes some jokes... that's when you say, "You know what I always wanted to do just once?"


    Then after your 3some... IT'S A MIRACLE!!! They mixed up your medical chart with someone else at the hospital.


    WOW!

    jimmythehutt 2751 2010-05-21 08:37:55.0 login to vote score 0
    abe froman: But would he fuck a sane girl crazy?

    With his relationship history, at least what he's posted, I'd have to say that's a "yes", but not the good kind of crazy.
    grotfabrieken rubbishhausen 561 2010-05-21 08:38:12.0 login to vote score 1
    someone who may or may not be subby: Yes. In the pooper too.

    Then stick in your pooper
    abe froman 2713 2010-05-21 08:38:58.0 login to vote score 3
    nerd by proxy: Subby should dress up like a lesbian while he's scheming--I hear that helps with some things. :)

    How does flannel and a mullet help?
    swingingjohnson 175 2010-05-21 08:39:55.0 login to vote score 2
    quick1: And how has trying to fuck crazy women sane worked for you so far?

    It has it's ups and downs.
    nerd by proxy 4296 2010-05-21 08:41:19.0 login to vote score 0
    abe froman: How does flannel and a mullet help?

    I came.
    abe froman 2713 2010-05-21 08:42:01.0 login to vote score 1
    nerd by proxy: I came.

    Need a towel?
    nerd by proxy 4296 2010-05-21 08:43:18.0 login to vote score 1
    abe froman: Need a towel?

    No, I used one of your socks from under the bed.
    quinblake 1476 2010-05-21 08:45:13.0 login to vote score 4
    the anonymous instigator:
    Any suggestions?

    ...


    Um, ask her?


    worldbeater 617 2010-05-21 08:46:33.0 login to vote score 3
    swingingjohnson: Get some VISINE. A minute before she walks in the door drop 1/2 the bottle in your eyes.

    This will simulate that you were crying.

    Then when she walks in, start to wipe the tears from your eyes. Act like you don't want her to see you cry.

    Well it's obvious your crying... so when she consoles you and ask you "Ohhh, what's the matter sweetheart? You can tell me... what is it honey?"

    That's when you tell her you fainted at work today and you woke up in the ER. The doctors told you you have inoperable brain cancer. You have a month to live at the most.

    THEN, she starts crying you tell her how unfair life is. "I'm too young to die... there's so much I wanted to do.... sniff, sniff."

    THEN, she cries with you and tries to cheer you up... she makes some jokes... that's when you say, "You know what I always wanted to do just once?"


    Then after your 3some... IT'S A MIRACLE!!! They mixed up your medical chart with someone else at the hospital.


    WOW!


    You thought way, way too much about that.
    swingingjohnson 175 2010-05-21 08:46:40.0 login to vote score 1
    quinblake: Um, ask her?

    Oh wow.

    Never thought of that.

    But what if she freaks out on him and never lets him live it down for the next 50 years?


    Faking a brain tumor is probably safer.
    abe froman 2713 2010-05-21 08:46:41.0 login to vote score 0
    quinblake: Um, ask her?

    Stating the obvious, huh?
    swingingjohnson 175 2010-05-21 08:47:28.0 login to vote score 0
    worldbeater: You thought way, way too much about that.

    Not really. It was pretty spontaneous.
    nerd by proxy 4296 2010-05-21 08:49:29.0 login to vote score 1
    swingingjohnson: Does subby have the alt woman in mind already?You can always get her drunk and set the scenario up with an escort with a well planned script.But really... mutilato is the bN expert on this kinda stuff.

    I think this was the scheme most likely to work. No pressure, just some drinks with a friend. That way, if it's going to happen, you'll see some signs; but if not, then no harm done.
    jimmythehutt 2751 2010-05-21 08:51:56.0 login to vote score 3
    quinblake: Um, ask her?

    That would be too easy, and imply trust and respect.

    You know, things that are necessary for a healthy relationship.
    swingingjohnson 175 2010-05-21 08:52:32.0 login to vote score 2
    nerd by proxy: I think this was the scheme most likely to work. No pressure, just some drinks with a friend. That way, if it's going to happen, you'll see some signs; but if not, then no harm done.

    It all depends on how bad he wants it.

    Some good booze with the wife and a friend and a fun game of "Truth Or Dare" worked for me once.

    Started out with, "I dare you to make out with her."

    Worked like a charm.
    abe froman 2713 2010-05-21 08:52:54.0 login to vote score 6

    nerd by proxy 4296 2010-05-21 08:56:43.0 login to vote score 2
    swingingjohnson: It all depends on how bad he wants it.Some good booze with the wife and a friend and a fun game of "Truth Or Dare" worked for me once.Started out with, "I dare you to make out with her."Worked like a charm.

    Sounds fun!
    swingingjohnson 175 2010-05-21 08:57:34.0 login to vote score 3
    nerd by proxy: Sounds fun!

    CraigJohnsonBand@gmail
    so vote republican 6688 2010-05-21 08:59:43.0 login to vote score 1
    It depends on her age, but if she has said she's specifically not interested, then you're probably out of luck.
    swingingjohnson 175 2010-05-21 09:01:09.0 login to vote score 1
    so vote republican: It depends on her age, but if she has said she's specifically not interested, then you're probably out of luck.

    WAT?! It don't depend on her age.


    nerd by proxy 4296 2010-05-21 09:02:53.0 login to vote score 0
    so vote republican: It depends on her age, but if she has said she's specifically not interested, then you're probably out of luck.

    What does her age have to do with it? Not being contrary, just curious.
    so vote republican 6688 2010-05-21 09:04:52.0 login to vote score 0
    nerd by proxy: What does her age have to do with it? Not being contrary, just curious.

    I just figure, like most people, people tend to get more set in their ways the older they get.
    swingingjohnson 175 2010-05-21 09:05:59.0 login to vote score 1
    so vote republican: I just figure, like most people, people tend to get more set in their ways the older they get.

    I don't think so. Not when it comes to this.
    nerd by proxy 4296 2010-05-21 09:07:01.0 login to vote score 0
    so vote republican: I just figure, like most people, people tend to get more set in their ways the older they get.

    Maybe. But I think more people become more confident and more likely to try something like this.
    swingingjohnson 175 2010-05-21 09:08:22.0 login to vote score 1
    so vote republican: I just figure, like most people, people tend to get more set in their ways the older they get.

    Some people, male or female, can be very promiscuous all their life. Some other people can wake up 1 day at 30, 40 or 80 and lose inhibitions.

    Anything can spark it.
    swingingjohnson 175 2010-05-21 09:09:53.0 login to vote score 1
    nerd by proxy: Maybe. But I think more people become more confident and more likely to try something like this.

    I dare you to make out with so_vote_republican.

    (I think he's a chick)
    abe froman 2713 2010-05-21 09:10:01.0 login to vote score 2
    swingingjohnson: Some people, male or female, can be very promiscuous all their life. Some other people can wake up 1 day at 30, 40 or 80 and lose inhibitions.

    Anything can spark it.


    Usually alcohol.
    quinblake 1476 2010-05-21 09:12:13.0 login to vote score 1
    so vote republican: I just figure, like most people, people tend to get more set in their ways the older they get.

    Agreed. Especially males and their proclivity for nostalgia-rock.
    nerd by proxy 4296 2010-05-21 09:12:28.0 login to vote score 1
    swingingjohnson: I dare you to make out with so_vote_republican.(I think he's a chick)

    You forgot the booze.
    abe froman 2713 2010-05-21 09:12:50.0 login to vote score 0
    quinblake: Agreed. Especially males and their proclivity for nostalgia-rock.

    Didn't happen with me. I disowned all that I used to listen to and now I listen to NPR.

    Lame, huh?
    quick1 501 2010-05-21 09:14:39.0 login to vote score 2
    nerd by proxy: Maybe. But I think more people become more confident and more likely to try something like this.

    I dare you to look down your shirt and spell attic.
    swingingjohnson 175 2010-05-21 09:15:56.0 login to vote score 1
    abe froman: Usually alcohol.

    True. But the best sex is sober sex.

    Booze sex tends to make you feel a little guilty and unsure the next morning.

    Good sober sex makes you feel wonderful the next day.


    {Oh shit... I just had a flashback of the time I woke up hungover next to that 300 lbs German bartender woman in 1989.}
    abe froman 2713 2010-05-21 09:23:59.0 login to vote score 1
    swingingjohnson:
    {Oh shit... I just had a flashback of the time I woke up hungover next to that 300 lbs German bartender woman in 1989.}


    Thanks for the mental image. Now I need mind bleach.
    spongegirl circleskirt 382 2010-05-21 09:25:37.0 login to vote score 2
    swingingjohnson: True. But the best sex is sober sex.

    Booze sex tends to make you feel a little guilty and unsure the next morning.

    Good sober sex makes you feel wonderful the next day.


    {Oh shit... I just had a flashback of the time I woke up hungover next to that 300 lbs German bartender woman in 1989.}


    Did you get your schnizel sucked?
    nerd by proxy 4296 2010-05-21 09:26:13.0 login to vote score 1
    swingingjohnson: {Oh s**t... I just had a flashback of the time I woke up hungover next to that 300 lbs German bartender woman in 1989.}

    Did you have to gnaw off your wienerschnitzel to get away?
    nerd by proxy 4296 2010-05-21 09:26:43.0 login to vote score 2
    spongegirl circleskirt: Did you get your schnizel sucked?

    Dammit! Beat me by a schnizel.
    swingingjohnson 175 2010-05-21 09:27:00.0 login to vote score 0
    quinblake: Agreed. Especially males and their proclivity for nostalgia-rock.

    So, just out of curiosity, since you are a very pretty/smart chick... what's your experience on this subject?


    spongegirl circleskirt 382 2010-05-21 09:28:17.0 login to vote score 1
    nerd by proxy: Dammit! Beat me by a schnizel.

    Heh. Wanna make out and bump glasses? :P
    quinblake 1476 2010-05-21 09:28:29.0 login to vote score 3
    swingingjohnson: So, just out of curiosity, since you are a very pretty/smart chick... what's your experience on this subject?

    On nostalgia-rock? I despise it.

    abe froman 2713 2010-05-21 09:28:30.0 login to vote score 2
    swingingjohnson: So, just out of curiosity, since you are a very pretty/smart chick... what's your experience on this subject?


    nerd by proxy 4296 2010-05-21 09:28:49.0 login to vote score 3
    spongegirl circleskirt: Heh. Wanna make out and bump glasses? :P

    Not wearing my glasses today, but we could bump muffins.
    twitch osx 948 2010-05-21 09:29:21.0 login to vote score 2
    My gf would probably be into this at some point.. since she's already done it before.
    spongegirl circleskirt 382 2010-05-21 09:29:41.0 login to vote score 1
    nerd by proxy: Not wearing my glasses today, but we could bump muffins.

    lol!

    nerd by proxy 4296 2010-05-21 09:30:15.0 login to vote score 0
    twitch osx: My gf would probably be into this at some point.. since she's already done it before.

    Oh yeah, she's into it. TRUST ME.
    randy bandyleg 5267 2010-05-21 09:31:29.0 login to vote score 0
    these tags are full of win
    nerd by proxy 4296 2010-05-21 09:31:50.0 login to vote score 0
    spongegirl circleskirt: lol!

    Tagged bumping muffins
    spongegirl circleskirt 382 2010-05-21 09:32:46.0 login to vote score 0
    nerd by proxy: Oh yeah, she's into it. TRUST ME.

    Yep.
    bonus_eruptus 967 2010-05-21 09:32:48.0 login to vote score 4
    valentinselezynov: If you want your wife to start doing women you could try subliminal messages. Every night in bed, when she's asleep, whisper "you want to have sex with Chloe from work and you want to let me watch and bring me an apple danish".

    FTFY
    swingingjohnson 175 2010-05-21 09:36:21.0 login to vote score 2
    nerd by proxy: Did you have to gnaw off your wienerschnitzel to get away?

    I swear to GOD (the regular god) this is the truth.

    She was a bartender at the dive bar closest to our base. I was a skinny 145 pound 19 year old private in the army in Germany. She had to be at least 300lbs. I woke up in an almost total booze black-out.

    All I remember was her snoring like a grizzly bear and I was in her bedroom, naked... and I couldn't find my clothes.

    I opened up the closet in her bedroom and saw a row of SGT MAJOR US ARMY uniforms hanging in there. Filed uniforms, dress uniforms and formal uniforms. On the closet shelf were his helmets and hats and boxes of ammo.

    I only found my jeans. No shoes, no shirt... so I put on my pants and ran out of the apartment complex. Thank god I had my wallet.

    I took a cab back home to the base... got to my bunk and didn't leave for the next 24 hours. I was shaking like a leaf.

    Months later, the meanest, baddest SGT MAJOR on the base was conducting our 6 month formal inspection. He got right in my face and smiled and winked at me.

    To this day, it's all a mystery to me what happened.
    jimmythehutt 2751 2010-05-21 09:38:38.0 login to vote score 1
    swingingjohnson: I swear to GOD (the regular god) this is the truth.

    She was a bartender at the dive bar closest to our base. I was a skinny 145 pound 19 year old private in the army in Germany. She had to be at least 300lbs. I woke up in an almost total booze black-out.

    All I remember was her snoring like a grizzly bear and I was in her bedroom, naked... and I couldn't find my clothes.

    I opened up the closet in her bedroom and saw a row of SGT MAJOR US ARMY uniforms hanging in there. Filed uniforms, dress uniforms and formal uniforms. On the closet shelf were his helmets and hats and boxes of ammo.

    I only found my jeans. No shoes, no shirt... so I put on my pants and ran out of the apartment complex. Thank god I had my wallet.

    I took a cab back home to the base... got to my bunk and didn't leave for the next 24 hours. I was shaking like a leaf.

    Months later, the meanest, baddest SGT MAJOR on the base was conducting our 6 month formal inspection. He got right in my face and smiled and winked at me.

    To this day, it's all a mystery to me what happened.


    Why is it the really interesting military stories always happen in Germany and Japan.

    /and occasionally Spain if the story is Navy.
    grotfabrieken rubbishhausen 561 2010-05-21 09:39:54.0 login to vote score 2
    swingingjohnson: I swear to GOD (the regular god) this is the truth.

    She was a bartender at the dive bar closest to our base. I was a skinny 145 pound 19 year old private in the army in Germany. She had to be at least 300lbs. I woke up in an almost total booze black-out.

    All I remember was her snoring like a grizzly bear and I was in her bedroom, naked... and I couldn't find my clothes.

    I opened up the closet in her bedroom and saw a row of SGT MAJOR US ARMY uniforms hanging in there. Filed uniforms, dress uniforms and formal uniforms. On the closet shelf were his helmets and hats and boxes of ammo.

    I only found my jeans. No shoes, no shirt... so I put on my pants and ran out of the apartment complex. Thank god I had my wallet.

    I took a cab back home to the base... got to my bunk and didn't leave for the next 24 hours. I was shaking like a leaf.

    Months later, the meanest, baddest SGT MAJOR on the base was conducting our 6 month formal inspection. He got right in my face and smiled and winked at me.

    To this day, it's all a mystery to me what happened.


    Was your ass sore in the cab ride back to the base?
    swingingjohnson 175 2010-05-21 09:40:23.0 login to vote score 1
    twitch osx: My gf would probably be into this at some point.. since she's already done it before.

    Yeah man. I remember that.

    Tell her I said "Hey!"
    swingingjohnson 175 2010-05-21 09:41:16.0 login to vote score 0
    grotfabrieken rubbishhausen: Was your ass sore in the cab ride back to the base?

    No, no. But I did check. All clear.
    grotfabrieken rubbishhausen 561 2010-05-21 09:44:21.0 login to vote score 1
    swingingjohnson: No, no. But I did check. All clear.

    Nurse, more mind bleach please!
    so vote republican 6688 2010-05-21 09:45:00.0 login to vote score 1
    swingingjohnson: Some people, male or female, can be very promiscuous all their life. Some other people can wake up 1 day at 30, 40 or 80 and lose inhibitions.

    Anything can spark it.


    Occasionally, but the former is more likely.

    Sometimes they deny themselves for a long time for other reasons.

    But it doesn't sound like subby's wife has any reason to have been denying herself. It just sounds like she's not interested.
    surfnazi 932 2010-05-21 09:45:09.0 login to vote score 3
    My ex got super wasted one time and did one of her friends in the car by some bar. Both of them were into anal too, it was my greatest missed opportunity.
    swingingjohnson 175 2010-05-21 09:47:10.0 login to vote score 2
    jimmythehutt: Why is it the really interesting military stories always happen in Germany and Japan.

    /and occasionally Spain if the story is Navy.


    Because in those countries our bases are doing nothing but wasting time.

    No combat. No stress. Just sustaining the local foreign economies and wasting time and money and getting drunk every night.

    I am very grateful I served in a time and place of peace and I respect so much our soldiers that really have to bust their asses today.
    nerd by proxy 4296 2010-05-21 09:50:55.0 login to vote score 3
    swingingjohnson: To this day, it's all a mystery to me what happened.

    And to this day, there's a chubby little half American kid with spectacular hair Taking Care of Business all over Berlin.
    abe froman 2713 2010-05-21 09:56:48.0 login to vote score 1
    nerd by proxy: And to this day, there's a chubby little half American kid with spectacular hair Taking Care of Business all over Berlin.

    Doing the nasty women over there so we don't have to here.
    swingingjohnson 175 2010-05-21 10:01:09.0 login to vote score 2
    the anonymous instigator:

    Well whatever happens AI, do bN good and post some cell phone pics on a follow-up thread.

    You can block out the faces.


    sloth 222 2010-05-21 10:10:04.0 login to vote score 0
    Likker.
    polydactylkatze 641 2010-05-21 10:12:19.0 login to vote score 5
    Just fast-forward to the end and grant her the divorce she deserves. It will save you both a peck of time.
    abe froman 2713 2010-05-21 10:13:03.0 login to vote score 1
    Well whatever happens AI, do bN good and post some cell phone pics on a follow-up thread.

    You never know. That pic could be like lemonparty.
    swingingjohnson 175 2010-05-21 10:14:49.0 login to vote score 0
    abe froman: Well whatever happens AI, do bN good and post some cell phone pics on a follow-up thread.

    You never know. That pic could be like lemonparty.


    Doubtful.

    I doubt old lemon party guys need any bN advice.

    They would go to FARK for that.
    hornwrecker 48 2010-05-21 10:22:04.0 login to vote score 0
    jimmythehutt: Why is it the really interesting military stories always happen in Germany and Japan.

    /and occasionally Spain if the story is Navy.


    Philippines for the Pacific Fleet.


    abe froman 2713 2010-05-21 10:24:46.0 login to vote score 1
    jimmythehutt: Why is it the really interesting military stories always happen in Germany and Japan.

    /and occasionally Spain if the story is Navy.




    Farewell and adieu to you fair Spanish ladies.
    abe froman 2713 2010-05-21 10:25:07.0 login to vote score 1
    hornwrecker: Philippines for the Pacific Fleet.

    I thought that was what your mom was for. I guess I was mistaken.
    wudgar 5556 2010-05-21 10:27:37.0 login to vote score 1
    install larger penis
    sloth 222 2010-05-21 10:29:00.0 login to vote score 1
    quinblake: Um, ask her?

    Dunno - that sounds like commie talk.
    abe froman 2713 2010-05-21 10:32:30.0 login to vote score 0


    You should only have to tell her once.
    hornwrecker 48 2010-05-21 10:33:28.0 login to vote score 0
    abe froman: I thought that was what your mom was for. I guess I was mistaken.

    She's too expensive, at least five bucks.

    American dollars had about 10-20 times the buying power there, than in the States. Use your imagination of how that would influence the spending habits of your typical, drunken sailor. It sure made Shore Patrol duty interesting.
    swingingjohnson 175 2010-05-21 10:39:31.0 login to vote score 1
    hornwrecker: She's too expensive, at least five bucks.

    American dollars had about 10-20 times the buying power there, than in the States. Use your imagination of how that would influence the spending habits of your typical, drunken sailor. It sure made Shore Patrol duty interesting.


    OK, here's my Mom. We've got $5 dollars... can I get $20?

    $20 Dollars?! $20 Dollars....


    superdug 3745 2010-05-21 10:40:05.0 login to vote score 3
    hornwrecker: She's too expensive, at least five bucks.

    American dollars had about 10-20 times the buying power there, than in the States. Use your imagination of how that would influence the spending habits of your typical, drunken sailor. It sure made Shore Patrol duty interesting.


    I need a graphic made, IE I need your help!

    3 basic laws of female attraction:

    1.) All women are lesbians.
    2.) Some women also like dick
    3.) Not all women are actively practicing lesbians
    superdug 3745 2010-05-21 10:41:08.0 login to vote score 2
    polydactylkatze: Just fast-forward to the end and grant her the divorce she deserves. It will save you both a peck of time.

    wow ... straight for the jugular eh?
    abbynormal 1917 2010-05-21 10:46:41.0 login to vote score 3
    polydactylkatze: Just fast-forward to the end and grant her the divorce she deserves. It will save you both a peck of time.

    I tend to think this is the sort of thing you should work out long before you get married.

    But subby, start small. Watch some sexy movies with lesbian scenes and threesomes. Talk to her about it. See if she'll fantasize with you.

    Either you'll find out she is receptive, or you'll know to give up.
    hornwrecker 48 2010-05-21 10:47:21.0 login to vote score 0
    superdug: I need a graphic made, IE I need your help!

    3 basic laws of female attraction:

    1.) All women are lesbians.
    2.) Some women also like dick
    3.) Not all women are actively practicing lesbians


    I'm not currently on my shooping computer. Don't even have any graphics programs installed on my laptop.
    quinblake 1476 2010-05-21 10:48:33.0 login to vote score 1
    sloth: Dunno - that sounds like commie talk.

    Talk commie to me, baby.
    grotfabrieken rubbishhausen 561 2010-05-21 10:50:39.0 login to vote score 2
    quinblake: Talk commie to me, baby.

    The workers control your means of production
    jimmythehutt 2751 2010-05-21 10:52:49.0 login to vote score 2
    quinblake: Talk commie to me, baby.

    From each according to his ability, to each according to his need.
    surfnazi 932 2010-05-21 10:54:29.0 login to vote score 3
    grotfabrieken rubbishhausen: The workers control your means of production

    Oh baby, from each according to his ability, to each according to his NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEYYYYEYEAEEAAAAAHHHHH!!!
    polydactylkatze 641 2010-05-21 10:54:35.0 login to vote score 1
    abbynormal: I tend to think this is the sort of thing you should work out long before you get married.

    That's the thing. Trying to weasel a threesome is something for a girlfriend of several weeks, not a wife.

    abbynormal: But subby, start small. Watch some sexy movies with lesbian scenes and threesomes. Talk to her about it. See if she'll fantasize with you.

    Either you'll find out she is receptive, or you'll know to give up.


    All good advice, the end part bolded for importance.

    surfnazi 932 2010-05-21 10:54:50.0 login to vote score 1
    jimmythehutt: From each according to his ability, to each according to his need.

    Next time I'll refresh.

    And finish up a little sooner.
    abe froman 2713 2010-05-21 10:57:13.0 login to vote score 2
    polydactylkatze: That's the thing. Trying to weasel a threesome is something for a girlfriend of several weeks, not a wife.



    All good advice, the end part bolded for importance.


    In other words, put it in the spank bank.
    bunnythor 544 2010-05-21 10:57:46.0 login to vote score 2
    swingingjohnson: I swear to GOD (the regular god) this is the truth.

    She was a bartender at the dive bar closest to our base. I was a skinny 145 pound 19 year old private in the army in Germany. She had to be at least 300lbs. I woke up in an almost total booze black-out.

    All I remember was her snoring like a grizzly bear and I was in her bedroom, naked... and I couldn't find my clothes.

    I opened up the closet in her bedroom and saw a row of SGT MAJOR US ARMY uniforms hanging in there. Filed uniforms, dress uniforms and formal uniforms. On the closet shelf were his helmets and hats and boxes of ammo.

    I only found my jeans. No shoes, no shirt... so I put on my pants and ran out of the apartment complex. Thank god I had my wallet.

    I took a cab back home to the base... got to my bunk and didn't leave for the next 24 hours. I was shaking like a leaf.

    Months later, the meanest, baddest SGT MAJOR on the base was conducting our 6 month formal inspection. He got right in my face and smiled and winked at me.

    To this day, it's all a mystery to me what happened.


    Cool story, Private Parts.
    quinblake 1476 2010-05-21 10:59:41.0 login to vote score 4
    surfnazi: Next time I'll refresh.

    And finish up a little sooner.


    Premature nationalisation.
    superdug 3745 2010-05-21 10:59:43.0 login to vote score 0
    hornwrecker: I'm not currently on my shooping computer. Don't even have any graphics programs installed on my laptop.

    Oh noes ... can you keep it in your mind then?
    polydactylkatze 641 2010-05-21 11:02:33.0 login to vote score 1
    abe froman: In other words, put it in the spank bank.

    Exactly! Every wife is a dominant submissive innocent schoolgirl lesbian slut in the spank bank.
    daisy may 2775 2010-05-21 11:04:26.0 login to vote score 4
    On the chance that she did agree, you MUST be sure to have very defined and clearly stated ground rules prior to the event.
    She will have to feel secure knowing that it is all about HER.
    If she is open to the idea, then she is confindent enough to state what she would be comfortable with. EI who touches whom when and where etc.
    Otherwise, there will be divorce lolyers in your future.
    quinblake 1476 2010-05-21 11:04:39.0 login to vote score 2
    polydactylkatze: Exactly! Every wife is a dominant submissive innocent schoolgirl lesbian slut in the spank bank.

    I would imagine that most guys aren't spanking it to images of their wife.
    abe froman 2713 2010-05-21 11:07:33.0 login to vote score 4
    quinblake: I would imagine that most guys aren't spanking it to images of their wife.

    But most guys are spanking it to images of someone else wife.
    abbynormal 1917 2010-05-21 11:10:12.0 login to vote score 3
    abe froman: In other words, put it in the spank bank.

    She might be willing to talk dirty and fantasize with subby while they have sex. I know my boyfriend and I have a few things they we think are very hot to talk about and pretend, that we either can't or shouldn't do IRL. It's still fun.
    swingingjohnson 175 2010-05-21 11:12:23.0 login to vote score 1
    abbynormal: She might be willing to talk dirty and fantasize with subby while they have sex. I know my boyfriend and I have a few things they we think are very hot...


    Like?


    surfnazi 932 2010-05-21 11:12:52.0 login to vote score 3
    abbynormal: She might be willing to talk dirty and fantasize with subby while they have sex. I know my boyfriend and I have a few things they we think are very hot to talk about and pretend, that we either can't or shouldn't do IRL. It's still fun.

    She still won't call me "Tyrano" as I roar while flipping my hands around as they're pulled in tight to my chest.

    I even did that thing with the hair pull that was her idea.
    swingingjohnson 175 2010-05-21 11:15:03.0 login to vote score 0
    daisy may: On the chance that she did agree, you MUST be sure to have very defined and clearly stated ground rules prior to the event.
    She will have to feel secure knowing that it is all about HER.
    If she is open to the idea, then she is confindent enough to state what she would be comfortable with. >>EI<< who touches whom when and where etc.
    Otherwise, there will be divorce lolyers in your future.


    I'm sorry... what does >>'EI'<< mean?
    abe froman 2713 2010-05-21 11:15:30.0 login to vote score 2
    swingingjohnson: I'm sorry... what does >>'EI'<< mean?

    Erectile Insertion?
    swingingjohnson 175 2010-05-21 11:16:05.0 login to vote score 0
    abe froman: Erectile Insertion?

    No shit?!
    polydactylkatze 641 2010-05-21 11:16:32.0 login to vote score 0
    quinblake: I would imagine that most guys aren't spanking it to images of their wife.

    But AI's fantasy specifically includes his wife.

    superdug: wow ... straight for the jugular eh?

    If subby's tone reflects his genuine attitude, it needs adjustin'.
    swingingjohnson 175 2010-05-21 11:17:41.0 login to vote score 1
    quinblake: I would imagine that most guys aren't spanking it to images of their wife.

    I do.

    All of them.
    daisy may 2775 2010-05-21 11:17:56.0 login to vote score 0
    swingingjohnson: I'm sorry... what does >>'EI'<< mean?

    I dont have wiki open, but some old latin crap loosely translated to the current english meaning "in other words"

    But I may be totally wrong and Abe's definition is probably the most correct.
    ;)
    swingingjohnson 175 2010-05-21 11:21:02.0 login to vote score 0
    daisy may: I dont have wiki open, but some old latin crap loosely translated to the current english meaning "in other words"

    But I may be totally wrong and Abe's definition is probably the most correct.
    ;)


    OK.

    (ei)

    In the future, please don't use shorthand lingo on bN.

    It's easy to confuse many of us bNers.

    And BTW... WELCOME BACK! I missed you and so good to see you back after all this time.

    What happened to you?
    envelope 1546 2010-05-21 11:22:33.0 login to vote score 1
    AI, I do want to let you know that if you succeed, it will be totally worth it.
    Nothing quite like watching your wife going down on another woman.
    swingingjohnson 175 2010-05-21 11:27:53.0 login to vote score 0
    envelope: AI, I do want to let you know that if you succeed, it will be totally worth it.
    Nothing quite like watching your wife going down on another woman.



    daisy may 2775 2010-05-21 11:28:38.0 login to vote score 1
    swingingjohnson: WELCOME BACK! I missed you and so good to see you back after all this time.What happened to you?

    Why thanx Sweetie!
    Got a boyfriend - had a few things to catch up on ;)


    sloth 222 2010-05-21 11:30:38.0 login to vote score 1
    abbynormal: But subby, start small. Watch some sexy movies with lesbian scenes and threesomes. Talk to her about it. See if she'll fantasize with you.

    See if the idea of you going down on another guy turns her on...

    Wait, what?
    cannonhawk 849 2010-05-21 11:32:44.0 login to vote score 0
    Drop a line to muir. That dude is a pimp.
    swingingjohnson 175 2010-05-21 11:39:01.0 login to vote score 0
    envelope: AI, I do want to let you know that if you succeed, it will be totally worth it.
    Nothing quite like watching your wife going down on another woman.



    quinblake 1476 2010-05-21 11:50:51.0 login to vote score 5
    envelope: AI, I do want to let you know that if you succeed, it will be totally worth it.
    Nothing quite like watching your wife going down on another woman.


    Not quite the same as catching her going down on another man?
    someone who may or may not be likes it hard 2010-05-21 11:56:29.0 login to vote score 1
    quinblake: Not quite the same as catching her going down on another man?

    Depends on your kink.
    sabine 745 2010-05-21 11:57:11.0 login to vote score 0
    daisy may: I dont have wiki open, but some old latin crap loosely translated to the current english meaning "in other words"

    It's backwards: i.e. = id est = that is (literally). Your "in other words" is good.
    trigonman3 63 2010-05-21 12:04:14.0 login to vote score 0
    daisy may: I dont have wiki open, but some old latin crap loosely translated to the current english meaning "in other words"

    But I may be totally wrong and Abe's definition is probably the most correct.
    ;)


    You just misspelled it. No biggie.

    i.e. stands for "id est", literally "that is".

    As a further general point of education, this abbreviation is often confused with e.g. which stands for "exempli gratia", "for the sake of example".
    daisy may 2775 2010-05-21 12:17:56.0 login to vote score 0
    trigonman3: You just misspelled it. No biggie.i.e. stands for "id est", literally "that is".As a further general point of education, this abbreviation is often confused with e.g. which stands for "exempli gratia", "for the sake of example".

    I knew it was some old latin crap. Not to bad for being 20 years away from high school lit. tho.

    ;)
    daisy may 2775 2010-05-21 12:22:15.0 login to vote score 0
    OH, and dammitall!
    I really did mean IE
    Keyboard has not quite recovered from yesterdays iced tea fiasco.
    swingingjohnson 175 2010-05-21 14:00:08.0 login to vote score 2
    the anonymous instigator:




    xomber 4626 2010-05-21 14:11:00.0 login to vote score 0
    jimmythehutt: Why is it the really interesting military stories always happen in Germany and Japan.

    /and occasionally Spain if the story is Navy.


    that's where the sheisse fetish and octopuss rape port were invented...it's like asking why a lot of anthropomorphic animals are created by Disney; it's that grade-a Colombian yeyo.


    If you logged in, you could post here.