Hide Comments Below
  • -3
  • -2
  • -1
  • 0
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • off
  • Beware of stealth Halal turkeys this thanksgiving



    Comment 0
    Cool
  • vote cool
  • vote uncool
  • Terms of Service Violation
  • strike inappropriate
  • not inappropriate
  • Other
  • sunlight
  • get permlink
  • Tagged with : butterball jihad , turkey jesus

    What are tags?
    fatsean 3838 2011-11-21 12:12:52.0 login to vote score 1
    ACK! This poison Muslim bird meat sticks in my throat!
    valaru 4404 2011-11-21 12:13:42.0 login to vote score 4
    fatsean: ACK! This poison Muslim bird meat sticks in my throat!

    lube your throat with kosher gravy
    rocket lawn chair 288 2011-11-21 12:16:25.0 login to vote score 2
    It's OK, 'murricans, just drop your Turkey into the cat box and voila-de-muslin'd

    fatsean 3838 2011-11-21 12:18:52.0 login to vote score 5
    rocket lawn chair: It's OK, 'murricans, just drop your Turkey into the cat box and voila-de-muslin'd

    People offended by this have an easy fix: The persons must buy two hamhocks. Stick one hamhock into the bird to de-muslimify it. The person will then reserve the second hamhock for rectal insertion.
    code_7 6865 2011-11-21 12:19:15.0 login to vote score 0
    I can't get to the u-tubes at work but I can imagine o'Rielly is OUTRAGED at this back-door islamification of our high holy christian holidays!
    libs keep banning me 9992 2011-11-21 12:20:14.0 login to vote score 1
    You libs won't be laughing when the sun starts to set after your stealth jihad turkey feast and you find your body involuntarily praying toward Mecca.
    submitter 10915 2011-11-21 12:23:01.0 login to vote score 0
    This is why I cook my turkey draped in bacon.
    willywanka 274 2011-11-21 12:23:32.0 login to vote score 0
    evidently her failure to stop the ground zero mosque has pushed dear ms. gellar over the edge, to the point where now she's yelling at livestock. poor thing, the evil muzzies finally got to her.
    bake 2096 2011-11-21 12:25:12.0 login to vote score 1
    fatsean: ACK!

    is that you, Bill the Cat?
    valaru 4404 2011-11-21 12:25:45.0 login to vote score 6
    it's strange, it is just cost effective to make your line kosher (hallal), more people can buy, and it doesn't mean anything to the non-kosher, non-hallal.

    so this woman is just a cunt.
    sandwichman 1416 2011-11-21 12:27:23.0 login to vote score 0
    Oh noes! The turkey might taste better!

    valaru:
    so this woman is just a cunt.


    Yes.
    the number 6534 2011-11-21 12:27:41.0 login to vote score 0
    willywanka: evidently her failure to stop the ground zero mosque has pushed dear ms. gellar over the edge, to the point where now she's yelling at livestock. poor thing, the evil muzzies finally got to her.

    Fighting Sharia is a thankless job.
    valaru 4404 2011-11-21 12:28:41.0 login to vote score 0
    sandwichman: Oh noes! The turkey might taste better!



    the ritual method of slaughter and preparation on poultry doesn't change the taste at all.

    beef, there is a difference.
    willywanka 274 2011-11-21 12:31:39.0 login to vote score 1
    the number: Fighting Sharia is a thankless job.

    someone has to hold back the butterball jihad.
    the number 6534 2011-11-21 12:32:49.0 login to vote score 1
    willywanka: someone has to hold back the butterball jihad.

    And all she wants is some appreciation for her hard work. A kind word, a pat on the back, a pig's head on a mosque... anything really.
    grahams 5 2011-11-21 12:33:00.0 login to vote score 1
    valaru: it's strange, it is just cost effective to make your line kosher (hallal), more people can buy, and it doesn't mean anything to the non-kosher, non-hallal.

    so this woman is just a cunt.


    I'm fairly picky about animal welfare and generally wouldn't buy halal slaughtered meat if I had another option. Still I suspect most people buying from massive turkey brands aren't going to give a flying fuck about how the bird met its end.
    valaru 4404 2011-11-21 12:34:55.0 login to vote score 0
    grahams: I'm fairly picky about animal welfare and generally wouldn't buy halal slaughtered meat if I had another option. Still I suspect most people buying from massive turkey brands aren't going to give a flying fuck about how the bird met its end.

    That is another discussion entirely.

    If done properly ritual slaughter is a fairly ethical way to do an animal in. A lot better than many other ways. IN MY OPINION.


    willywanka 274 2011-11-21 12:37:58.0 login to vote score 2


    fatsean: People offended by this have an easy fix: The persons must buy two hamhocks. Stick one hamhock into the bird to de-muslimify it. The person will then reserve the second hamhock for rectal insertion.

    alternate method: construct a hebrew national hot dog strap-on and proceed to anally violate the turkey with it until you climax and pass out in a pool of your own demuzzied gravy.

    it's pretty much a thanksgiving tradition at the ole 'wanka household.
    sandwichman 1416 2011-11-21 12:38:16.0 login to vote score 0
    valaru: the ritual method of slaughter and preparation on poultry doesn't change the taste at all.

    beef, there is a difference.


    Good to know. How about pork?
    keerbip 4358 2011-11-21 12:38:59.0 login to vote score 1
    All these Muslim turkeys are now in Hell because they didn't accept the all-encompassing compassion of Turkey Jesus.
    bake 2096 2011-11-21 12:39:23.0 login to vote score 1
    valaru: That is another discussion entirely.

    If done properly ritual slaughter is a fairly ethical way to do an animal in. A lot better than many other ways. IN MY OPINION.


    a sharp razor in a warm tub of water?
    actually, bleeding out is probably one of the most calming ways to go out if it is with surgical grade edge..just woosy then the lights go out


    bake 2096 2011-11-21 12:39:53.0 login to vote score 0
    keerbip: All these Muslim turkeys are now in Hell because they didn't accept the all-encompassing compassion of Turkey Jesus.

    the holy trinity...Turduckin

    max power 574 2011-11-21 12:41:24.0 login to vote score 0
    If you're going to slaughter animals in a halal way wouldn't you want to label it as such since you're obviously doing it to generate sales to those looking for such meat. Or is there a little halal symbol/mark on the packaging like with a lot of kosher stuff?
    willywanka 274 2011-11-21 12:41:29.0 login to vote score 0
    keerbip: All these Muslim turkeys are now in Hell because they didn't accept the all-encompassing compassion of Turkey Jesus.

    ok, who's breaking out the motherfuckin' photoshoops?
    valaru 4404 2011-11-21 12:41:42.0 login to vote score 2
    sandwichman: Good to know. How about pork?

    well kosher bacon is the best bacon, the pig would have been raised buy a rabbi, and it's hand smoked and cured, but it's such a secret you need to know the secret jewish handshake (as outlined in the extended version of the elder protocols of zion) to be able to buy it
    valaru 4404 2011-11-21 12:43:01.0 login to vote score 0
    bake: a sharp razor in a warm tub of water?
    actually, bleeding out is probably one of the most calming ways to go out if it is with surgical grade edge..just woosy then the lights go out


    it's sharp, there can be no pausing, no tearing and no pulling, it has to be one smooth motion.

    you know when you cut yourself with something sharp and you don't notice it until you see blood, it's kinda like that
    keerbip 4358 2011-11-21 12:45:23.0 login to vote score 2
    willywanka: ok, who's breaking out the motherfuckin' photoshoops?

    Somebody already took care of it.


    bake 2096 2011-11-21 12:52:36.0 login to vote score 0
    valaru: it's sharp, there can be no pausing, no tearing and no pulling, it has to be one smooth motion.

    you know when you cut yourself with something sharp and you don't notice it until you see blood, it's kinda like that



    yup, i have seen deer hit with an arrow, just give a slight quiver at the hit, and continue grazing

    shocker 99 2011-11-21 12:53:57.0 login to vote score 0
    valaru: well kosher bacon is the best bacon, the pig would have been raised buy a rabbi, and it's hand smoked and cured, but it's such a secret you need to know the secret jewish handshake (as outlined in the extended version of the elder protocols of zion) to be able to buy it


    And at that point, you won't be paying retail.
    shocker 99 2011-11-21 12:54:09.0 login to vote score 0

    *runs*
    valaru 4404 2011-11-21 12:57:03.0 login to vote score 1
    shocker: paying retail.

    why do you say these disgusting things to me, haven't my people suffered enough?
    trigonman3 63 2011-11-21 13:04:27.0 login to vote score 0
    valaru: why do you say these disgusting things to me, haven't my people suffered enough?

    You're gonna hafta mutilate your cocks and marry Jewish girls too. Sorry about that. That's a joke, son.
    valaru 4404 2011-11-21 13:05:54.0 login to vote score 0
    trigonman3: You're gonna hafta mutilate your cocks and marry Jewish girls too. Sorry about that. That's a joke, son.

    my cock looks neater, and I don't date jewish girls.

    ;)
    shocker 99 2011-11-21 13:06:01.0 login to vote score 0
    valaru: why do you say these disgusting things to me, haven't my people suffered enough?


    I thought that was part of the culture, suffering. Just thought I was helping


    #HELPING
    valaru 4404 2011-11-21 13:07:37.0 login to vote score 0
    shocker: I thought that was part of the culture, suffering. Just thought I was helping


    #HELPING


    actually you have a point, the chosen in chosen people isn't a good thing.

    to get into a heaven, in the jewish religion, a gentile has to follow 7 commandments, the jews have to follow 619.

    so chosen to suffer.


    and our grandparents never let us forget it.
    the number 6534 2011-11-21 13:08:06.0 login to vote score 1
    shocker: I thought that was part of the culture, suffering.

    So is complaining about it.
    valaru 4404 2011-11-21 13:10:03.0 login to vote score 0
    the number: So is complaining about it.

    I think that is the bigger part of it, actually complaining about anything.
    hornwrecker 48 2011-11-21 13:18:21.0 login to vote score 2
    valaru: I think that is the bigger part of it, actually complaining about anything.

    Thou shalt kvetch.
    bake 2096 2011-11-21 13:29:32.0 login to vote score 1
    valaru: I think that is the bigger part of it, actually complaining about anything.

    have you called your mother?
    valaru 4404 2011-11-21 13:30:25.0 login to vote score 2
    bake: have you called your mother?

    spoke to her today!

    HA!
    bake 2096 2011-11-21 13:40:58.0 login to vote score 0
    valaru: spoke to her today!

    HA!


    hows the cancer

    (forgive me bebe Yhewalalwe)
    valaru 4404 2011-11-21 13:42:32.0 login to vote score 0
    bake: hows the cancer

    (forgive me bebe Yhewalalwe)


    see you've been away, it stopped being a joke, but then there was an operation, so it can be a joke again.
    willywanka 274 2011-11-21 13:45:40.0 login to vote score 0
    bake: have you called your mother?



    "say hi to your mother for me"
    cannonhawk 849 2011-11-21 16:16:57.0 login to vote score 0
    valaru: it's strange, it is just cost effective to make your line kosher (hallal), more people can buy, and it doesn't mean anything to the non-kosher, non-hallal.

    so this woman is just a cunt.


    I bet her cunt is non-kosher too.
    If you logged in, you could post here.